PTSD Violence Gaslighting Threats impact Microbiome by Suzannah B. Troy
Please do not tell someone with PTSD to get over it, move on. Do not say let it go. Please!
(Note the index for this blog is on the right side of this blog....look and you will find it...my social media as a whistleblower is not protected so my work is under threat?)
https://x.com/vegansuz/status/2105704875656876338?s=46
A hole punched in my Retina by Dr. Andrew Fagelman‘s employee and then she grabbed my hair and ship my head so I have a ton of floaters. I needed an emergency surgery and that surgery on the Retina left me with immaculate pucker.
I also have floaters in both eyes because she shook my head so much as I held my bags, my arm numb from having a system, removed two injections in my elbow…..
It’s so overwhelming I talk fast. I think fast I rarely sleep with my eyes are red from dry eyes from lack of sleep because the brain the mind the stomach all the different systems need downtime like your iPhone. It needs to be shut off eventually..
I have so much pain if I’m quiet there’s pain in my stomach. I’m gonna get to the Microbiome but first a little more PTSD sharing…… because it’s so shocking and I know it shocks people I share this with….
I was a victim of inexcusable violence lies gaslighting crime upon crime starting October 1, 2012 not to mention a heinous threat October 7, 2012 on Google youtube which I reported to every division of Google in YouTube I could and they did nothing but a few days before my birthday this year they took down my channel to silence me or allow, allowing themselves to be a tool to silence me, and again my health really tanked I was triggered and one of the symptoms that’s overwhelming, his stomach pain, acute insomnia, fight, and flight it goes on and on—
I use Tiny health to help me navigate A hugely distended stomach. This is a symptom that developed after the attack October 1, 2012 and the days following including prepping for false arrest Saturday the Jewish Sabbath 4 PM unless I drop charges I was violently threatened. There were many threats to me which in the real world is a crime when you threaten someone during an open investigation it’s a crime but in New York City as we know, some people are above and some Victims Lives have no value. I stopped chewing my food and when I’m extremely triggered, I am stuffing my food in my mouth and eat past the point of comfort sometimes even to the point of pain. As the last resort this year, I joined Dr Joel Fuhrman‘s website and I am not 100% compliant but I already lost over 20 pounds. Thanks to this brilliant and intense MD who I’ve never met. I also have a wonderful primary care MD thinks outside the box and he understands that I don’t believe answers are in pills and pharmaceutical companies.
I was violated at a doctors, the violence so intense. I had to get emergency surgery on a Friday and then I used to be false the rest of the next day Saturday 4 PM unless I drop charges so how can I ever trust or feel safe in the world or at a doctors or with the police, considering I was to be kidnaped if I didn’t drop charges, and this wasn’t Russia or Putin. There was a Whistleblower on corruption in New York City government, and quite an eccentric one I described pre the too movement in my Federal lawsuit that I’m across between Mae West and Mike Wallace. I never imagined that people were discriminate against me and be open to violent threats and breaking more laws to make zero crimes and lying about it in every court, where I asked for Justice. I am in shock and when I tell doctors and medical staff and veterinarians my story, they are horrified.
Breathe. Slow exhalations…. Heard Dr Joel Fuhrman in a podcast say this: "Let me know what the thing you see, do or experience that gives you the most satisfaction or pleasure. Minute to minute practice liking the world, seeking out reasons to appreciate reality.”
Dr Jud Brewer ran great group zooms View his abs, unwinding, anxiety, and his eating app….
I see sun light kissing trees… breathe in….
I’m triggered today and my stomach is distended and I have pain pain in my head as if I’ve been punched over and over pain throughout my body because PTSD amplifies pain and I’m spending a big part of it alone.
14 years later I walk up with nauseous, pain in my head as if she has done another running punch a sucker punch to my head…. My head hurts, I have a ton of floaters in both eyes and I feel so nauseous I may vomit. My stomach is killing me, my head….I think of. My false arrest date Saturday 4pm the Jewish Sabbath and NYPD Detective John Vergona refused to answer are you anti-Semitic. He has never met me but he has VIOLENTLY threatened. Me over the phone and lied in Federal Appellate through Corp Counselor lawyer Jonathan Popolow that he did not know I was Jewish and he was going to arrest us. Both. These are lies and can easily be be proven but I guess Netflix homicide heroes with powerful protectors are allowed to lie in Federal Court and all courts…. There is an email to NYPD detective John Vergona and 2 of Police Commissioner Ray Kelly’s detectives Duffy and Martian Brown false arrest the Babbling Jew on the Sabbath. The subject of the email is “G-d Sees All” and it is dated October 16, 2012. Delita Hooks admitted in a deposition she targeted me from the moment I sat down she said she was never told to turn herself in. Just me. For the few true statements Dr Andrew Fagelman made I am grateful because all underscore in my opinion they are guilty of lying and were in the loop they are teflon and could get away with anything… that my life and the truth mean nothing and for their perjuries if lying in depositions is perjury because they are transparent and provable in court.
Hiking with a friend who pointed out how fast my brain, my thoughts were so we slowed down and looked at different types of ferns….the beauty, breath in breath out. Dr Alan Desmond years ago told me that walking in nature, breathing could help my microbiome….
October 2012 I was a victim of violence at a medical office where I have more rights than I do in the streets of NY…protesting then mayor Mike Bloomberg CityTime and 911 Tech scandals and pre the attack on youtube (one long Suzannahartist documentary) I tell Bloomberg’s bodyguard NYPD Lt O’Sullivan, you can hear me in my YouTube saying this is America, I am on a public sidewalk…. (My Dad as a teenager served in World War 2 and he taught me to love this country as if I just arrived.) I never imagined I would be yelled at at a doctors office. You have no rights and then it seems as if that was the truth and people without a moral compass were getting away with what feels like a kind of murder and the Running punched my head could have killed me if I’d fallen back and hit the back of my head. There was force Abel touching, and an assistant district attorney, admitted that a sexual assault and said he would talk to his supervisors and get back to me and I knew I would never hear from him again because my case was given what I call the jeffrey epstein Teflon because he wasn’t able by the NYPD and Manhattan DA for years along with Max.
The lack of accountability after my patient rights, my patient safety and my body violated starting with being yelled at from behind a medical desk you have no rights, and the many courts seeming to look away as in my opinion more crimes and abuses are committed like lying because either they are lying or I am. I am not lying and I believe Dr Andrew Fagelman lied when he stated he did not read the yelp reviews. The ones we showed him and discounted them because one was a male dressed as a nun. I once worked at Barneys’ and they told us NEVER JUDGE a person by the way they are dressed.
It is worse than I can convey but when my parents got divorced while I was in college I gained a huge amount of weight even distributed but when I am violated I gained 40 pounds and HUGELY around my midsection only as well as pains in my chest when the PTSD is most triggered…. Sometimes I feel like I am flatlining….as if I am dying…My primary care MD has done blood work but I tell him I feel like the PTSD is killing me. I can’t compartmentalize.
I have seen a heart MD and she found a mild tricuspid regurgitation… I think it is from the PTSD and acute insomnia — but there is no connection in this condition to PTSD. My Withing App picked up some aberrations so to be safe I went to a heart MD but heart feels broken from being violated and the immense cruelty and lies and criminal wrong doing = No Justice Yet.
AI Overview
Feeling "extra heartbeats" (often called ectopic beats, PVCs, or heart palpitations) is an incredibly common and terrifying symptom of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). In PTSD, your nervous system's fight-or-flight survival mode is chronically stuck in the "on" position, flooding your body with stress hormones like adrenaline. [1, 2, 3, 4]
Brain pain, stomach pain, pain down my mindline —- oops mid-line of my body from head throat stomach to my toes…, constant urination, frequent small poops when I am triggered or constipation, or worse the runs….sleep deprivation and the constant injuries from waking up in the middle of the night….the stress dreams, I wasn’t safe at an MD office in NYC! I was threatened with FALSE ARREST Saturday at 4pm October 20, 2012, October 3, 2012 Ajohn starts the online gaslighting so I post the YouTube and now watch it everyday until they stop the lies and apologize and clearly in 14 years no sign of Dr Andrew Fagelman every being successful taught the Hippocratic oath! Everyone who broke laws including a lawyer using he fake account on Google Youtube Bob Dobalina October 7th, 2012 that threatened me with retaliation using the word c#nt and his friend lawyer Charles Ward who did not use the C word but agreed with the promise of retaliation against me if I took any action promising I would lose…my guess Joe Tacopina and Chad Seigel who have never denied the allegations. My guess Tacopina simply made calls and joined the co-ordinated efforts,… My guess Tacopina drafted the letter Hooks submitted so heinous NYPD Detective Andrew Dwyer, his bosses, Corp Counsel NYPD legal withheld it. It took me half a decade and a threat of NYPD legal FOIL to get a copy.
I have had more fibroid tumors grow because I have been stuck in fight and flight..
PTSD so overwhelmed meI never experienced menopause but ready for this? After my patient right and my body violated me I was yelled at by NYPD (now Netflix homicide hero) detective John Vergona — he yelled over the phone you are going to drop charges or I am going to arrest you! He became ever more abusive and more verbal violent. He did not want to hear about the problems I was having seeing out of my eyes from Dr Andrew Fagelman’s violent employee. He moved the arrest date to the Jewish Sabbath Saturday 4pm and lied on Federal Appellate he would arrest us both when my attacker a teflon medical receptionist office manager (Dr Fagelman under oath claimed she had not title although her interview with Jamaica News included that she was the art curator for the premier medical office. Not premier in my book when Dr Fagelman and his employees and his college roommates receptionist don’t understand d the Hippocratic oath.
Isolation, over eating, little to no social contact, scybalous stools but incase “toilet troubles” are isolating have no fear you will have a family of hemorrhoids to keep you company.
Deilta Hooks confirmed in a deposition she was never told to turn herself in Saturday. Just me her victim the woman that years later she took a break from her perjurers like perjury she was already out from behind the desk. Can you imagine being so confident that the other 2 receptionist would not speak up?
I had a hole in my retina and a ton of floaters in my eyes from the running punch to my head and a hole in my retina from a running punch to my head that could have killed me I had fallen backward. I was suppose to be arrested Saturday 4pm the day after emergency surgery and I had stopped being able to eat after I agreed to false arrest and followed up with an email to the NYPD police commish detectives Duffy and Brown and Vergona — false arrest the babbling Jew on the Sabbath G-d Sees All. I was suppose to get my period Saturday but I had dropped 5 pounds and I did not get my period…just bad cramping….
Do you know what scybalous stools are? After shocking violence October 1, 2012 I developed all kinds of terrible symptoms from violence that could have killed me if I had fallen backward after I was violently attacked and then lied about, gaslighted and victimized by the NYPD after the doctor’s office who acted on an October 7th, 2012 threat calling me a fight picking C#nt and promising if I took any action I would have the tables turned. The perp my guess a wannabe super lawyer who I protested his and his partner’s treatment of an NYPD rape victim.
PTSD is about a lot of repetition because the mind can’t come to terms with such disturbing events and repeats them hoping each time for a solution in my case JUSTICE, apologies including owning up, taking responsibility and more….
Hi, my name is Suzannah B. Troy and October 1, 2012 I would have told you I am an artist and activist in NYC….That day I was almost murdered by what I can only describe as a road raging receptionist office manger Delita Hooks who Dr Andrew Fagelman described as exemplary and stated in a deposition, is exemplary.
Pause how did violence impact my Microbiome often called our 2nd brain…
Besides constant all day Chihuahua poops that 14 years later I would learn are called scibulus stool thanks to Dr Andrew Huberman’s guest Dr. Chris Thompson.
October 1, 2012 I went to get a small cyst removed from my elbow and left with a hole in my retina, floaters in both eyes from her repeatedly pulling my hair with the goal to pull me down the hall like a piece of trash to be thrown in to the elevator.
If I had fallen backward from the running punch, I could have died and in the YouTube when she threatening to beat me until I defecate on myself and then it was decided she and others she engaged along with volunteers like my guess the PERP who threatened me with retaliation during an open investigation conspired with the NYPD to make all crimes zero and to do that you have to commit even more crimes. I allege they did while trying to convince me it was mutual when it was not.
I sued in court and they lied I was not coerced and the NYPD, Corporation Council, NYPD legal, the first precinct, and internal affairs, the city of NY and EVERY INVESTIGATOR because they and every government agency I reached out including NYC comptroller investigator, Corp Counsel, Human Rights division of NYC gov, Manhattan DA had access to that letter but not me….It took me half a decade to get a couple BECAUSE I NEVER GIVE UP!
I have come to believe that PTSD is a Cancer of the MIND. Cancer is a worse more prevalent killer than Covid-19/
How could PTSD because a mind cancer. The people that harmed me and lied and lied and or conspired with others throwing to the wayside how sacred a doctor’s office is….as a bus driver said to me Delita Hooks punching you at a doctor’s is like hitting some at Church. You don’t do that.
I know you don’t care…. Most of you don’t. PTSD My brain hurts, my stomach, everything down my midline of my body.
I wake-u[ often feeling hung over but had no alcohol. I feel like I was at a rock concert and
I have been asked what do you want? Justice.
Instead, I feel like I somehow let their evil infect my mind feels like a Mind Cancer — the violence, the series of threats, the lies in a series of courts where I sought JUSTICE and no one countersued me. No one stated frivolous, instead I allege they lied in legal proceeding which must have made them feel godlike and me the piece of garbage that Dr Andrew Fagelman’s employee yelled at from behind the desk — WHO ARE YOU, YOU HAVE NO RIGHTS!
The lies and gaslighting leave me spinning on a wheel reliving it and makes me wonder if PTSD has links to cancer or weakened system that could make you vulnerable to maybe the biggest undocumented killer CANCER — worse then covid taking more people than heart disease.
Replay —-and please don’t correct my grammar, misspellings — you can figure out what I am trying to say and if you have empathy how hard it is to be heard….how long how exhausted my brain is….
I asked my doctor, Dr Vine ’s receptionist a simple question and when Dr F’s front desk employee Delita Hooks jumped in abusively I wrote the question to Dr vine who never got it and I am guessing because Hooks took it from the medical receptionist or asked her for it and that was how she got my name but under oath Delita Hooks stated she got my name from social media.
What she did not realize from this perjury that is underscores she came out from behind a long closed off desk to stalk me and she took it online. The first time I became aware was when AJohn came to my YouTube about mayor Mike Bloomberg SAIC CityTime payroll system and ECTP 911 because over budget combined almost 2 billion tax dollars and by the way I got punched at the Doctor’s office!
Ajohn said I was a liar and I threw the first punch. My doctor Dr Vine’s receptionist told me when I called from the First Precinct police station that the woman who punched me is called Delite — she spelled the name for me and she lied to me that Delita Hooks has no last name.
In deposition years later we learned Dr Andrew Fagleman never interviewed her for the job. He said she came with the office. He admitted he had no guidelines. He admitted he had no way to give feedback about the office. I believe my guess he committed perjury stating he did not look at yelp reviews but the critical ones he dismissed based on how their pictures look like one was a male dress as a nun…if I recall correctly. I worked at Barney’s and they had told us never judge someone by how they dress etc.
Dr Fagelman and his Travelers’ Insurance lawyer made of mockery of the violence and in my opinion a mockery of the judge that reprimanded them for their behavior in the deposition where when he was asked a question I put on a small piece of paper for my lawyer — he shook with anger and got on his cellphone in the deep as he ran out calling someone — I would like to know whom he called and if that person also took an oath and were they party to the goal to cheat lie and win? Dr Andrew Fagelman and Delita Hooks said underneath my Dr Kathleen Vine moved out 4-6 months later. She and her nurse who called me with the biopsy results from the cyst removed on my elbow, and Dr Vine’s receptionist all told me they moved to the East Village 2 weeks later. Dr Vine seemed shaken and told me she can’t have patients being assaulted.
It was also impossible to get any whiff of medical misconduct investigated and in the Depo years later Dr Fagelman admitted he had lots of NYPD patients and he admitted discussing what happened to me with his patients. He did that without ever apologizing and in my opinion that is one of many violations of the Hippocratic oath as well as in my opinion his many lies to attempt to JUSTIFY the UNJUSTIFIABLE.
I had thought about having a baby and that was over……I can’t bring a baby into a world where I am not even safe at a doctor’s. Everytime I tell a doctor they are horrified. They can’t believe it but I tell them so of the top cops and Manhattan District Attorney involved in giving Jeffrey Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwel teflon status.
I am using “Tiny Health” to improve my microbiome. The bouts of acute insomnia make healing very hard. Since the attack I have woken up in the middle of the night and broken or hair line fractured my toes and possible my nasal bones in full PTSD mode accidentally banging my head against in art work in my tiny home in NYC…. When Dr Andrew Fagelman’s employee whom he describes as exemplary punched a hole in my retina I was not legally blind but in that direction…
Besides microbiome I now have terrible dry eye and I wonder when I have my cataracts removed will the repaired retina and macular pucker be a complication? For now my nasal ones feel like they are breaking under the weight of my glasses which might protect me from another such attack at a doctor’s office like Dr Andrew Fagelman’s if there is such?
It is amazing how even serial killers have their fans….
My brain hurts my stomach hurts and the impact on the my life from violence lies and 0 remorse and failure or worse complicity all teflon all above scrutiny still overwhelms me. It tightens even some medical professionals and I show them the video. As I approach the 14 years of dealing with the trauma I feel like sick, the deepest exhaustion and I remind you if you want evidence of micobiome problems in my photos of my cover of my book about this that I self published on Amazon for 1 month only…..you see me with a distended stomach. Ever since violence and lies at Dr Andrew Fagelman’s I have this distended stomach when I am overtaken with what feels like mind cancer my term for PTSD and how misunderstood PTSD is.
The people that harmed me and celebrated not just the violence but the lying in court and getting away with it….
That is a kind of cancerous action on their part. Me hoping they would change is wishing them to redeem themselves and they aren’t interested….. Their diet karma pie and I wait.
If I die from this I will be waiting in Heaven for Justice. I donated my white blood cells to strangers….I did not ask their race relation or politics
The NY Times won’t publish what happened and they had just used my YouTube of Giuseppe Logan and the photo of us on a bench in Tompkin Square Park is beautiful and I look so young and so happy…..
With suffers being misunderstood PTSD and trauma come so many symptoms and now I can add microbiome disruption….
I am using Tiny Health and there is a mystery ailment and that is C. Diff but it isn’t bad enough to send me to the hospital. Following Dr Joel Fuhrman’s teaching as radically improved my health score with Tiny Health but I haven’t cured the PTSD yet….
I tell myself I am not alone. We the Victims are judged fair harsher than the men and women that took oaths and lied and some even took psychological evaluations and passed them. They have gotten away with terrible crimes and terrible abuses including of power and they many systems that protected them rather than hold them accountable.
How can I heal? How can I stop the isolation and the fear….. in this moment I am safe. I am resilent — oops resilient….breathe. PTSD is even rushing the exhales which are key to switching over to the parasympathetic system — the peace system —- so exhale and see if you can punctuate the exhale with a pause or a smile—aaaahhhhh….this feels good…. Look for the feel goods…
I am still learning from Rebecca Jo Rushdy how to help regulate my nervous system by joyfully tidying. She is a Marie Kondo disciple and I found her on Insight Timer…..she has given me some hope. PTSD, insomnia, anxiety can leave us feeling buried for me in fat, or clutter, or grief, a sleep deficit, a Justice deficit. Andrew Taylor Spudfit a coach of mine at one time asked what can I do —what action can I take right now in this moment to feel better? It could be cleaning the dishes….Aahhh the felt better.
I was feeling so much better looking forward to my 64th birthday having lost 20 pounds with Dr Joel Fuhrman’s coaching including Steph who had me put a post on the mirror — that said slow down. If you could see how I inhale food….so I try to punctuate as much as I can in my life with breath… inhale exhale I love Dr Jud Brewer’s teaching….
But July 12 2026 Google Youtube who protected the October 7, 2012 threat to me during an open investigation allowed those trying to silence me compulsively posting comments about Prince Andrew and the US Attorney Southern District —- let’s say that Mr Berman called Andrew a liar with out using the ‘L” word and I wondered if Prince Andrew stating he would cooperate and than not — perhaps he waived diplomatic immunity….I included links and my 2ndary channel RaphaelbySuzannah that lived there for years was removed with all comments…
My health has tanked again, stomach pain, acute insomnia the worst in a year….etc…
How can I find a safe mindset to heal….?
Working on it…. I believe I look far older…. The US Government had me explain what happened to me that I look so radically different. I directed them to the Dr Andrew Fagelman YouTube where his receptionist Delita Hooks assaulted me and filed a false cross complaint.
I am exhausted….wouldnt you be? It would be natural but what the criminals did along with their protectors isn’t natural or should I say ethical? There I go again…
You will see repetitiveness. That is PTSD because the mind is in shock. This morning I woke up like I had been punched in the head again — a running punch to my head as part of Dr Fagelmans employee street fighting routine suckering punching me Dr Vines patient my arm numb from 2 injections in my elbow to have a cyst removed. See this image of me holding bags? How many bags am I holding? She and the NYPD detectives from the First Precinct, Internal Affairs and Corporation Council the City of NY Lawyers knew this and they all conspired to withhold a letter to NYPD Andrew Dwyer threatening me with even more false cross complaints if I dare come back and report the many crimes the NYPD downgraded and falsified follow up reports called DD5s and to lie in court it was a mutual assault. Delita Hooks has admitted years later she has a history of street fights.
Justice when where will I be alive I feel like I was murdered it feels like a slow death.
I look much older than my age. My face is a grimace, unless I am compulsively, smiling, and an anxious smile because I don’t feel safe.
I tell myself Leif can change for the better unexpectedly. I’ve never felt such a deep exhaustion as I do. I feel like Mr. Smith has gone to Washington that black-and-white film by Frank Capra starring Jimmy Stewart except I don’t feel like I can keep going, but I do. I never have felt this kind of exhaustion and I fear I will pass out. I will die from trauma, PTSD as a killer and harms the brain, the mind, the different vital organs and systems throughout the body, but you can fight back by not fighting, by loving, by being grateful, by breathing, by deciding you’re worthy enough to take time to chew your food to breathe to move your body and most of all to sleep. I have a big sleep deficit and I have big challenges, but I’ve got to hold onto Hope.
Find “agency” find hope, and belief in choices right now nutritious for your mind, for your body, for you….miraculous healing miraculous Justice. Miraculous beyond this….
PTSD is reliving it over and over because it is unbelievable but all true…
